Real Friends

For the first time, I watched Mamma Mia last night. As someone who loves musicals so much I don’t know why I’ve never seen it. I ended up loving it, I mean how could I not? 

There is so much love in the story and characters. The love of family and friends and life. 

It is an uniquely alive story. 

And it got me thinking about something I have been meaning to write about.

Life should be alive. 

Yes I know that is obvious, but I really mean it. Life should not be wasted on silly or trivial or ridiculous things. I’ve heard some yoga teachers say, I think it’s @yogawithadrienne that says it, “let go of what does not serve you.” And that could not be more true.

And that brings me back round to this idea of love and life. Hold on to what you love and let go of what you don’t. What’s the point in doing it any other way?

I know this seems to be incoherent rambling, but I swear it does have a point. 

I had some friends, for most of my life this far they’ve been my friends. But this year I realized that I don’t know if any of the were really my friends. Yes we spent time together and we did have good times, but looking back I feel that there was so much more attention on each of them than ever on me. I was always giving them my friendship, but never receiving much back. 

Some people care so much more for themselves than others and sometimes that can’t be changed. 

I went years with these people, calling them my best friends but it drained me. I don’t think I even noticed until recently but it’s true. I thought I was the glue that held us all together, but I wasn’t. I was just a tiny piece to their puzzle, that it feels like they didn’t even need. I played along, but they were playing a different game.

Until I took myself out of the game entirely.

But real friends, that is completely different.

This is a vague and impossible to exactly define, at lease in words, concept. But we all know, or will know one day, what it feels like. 

It’s knowing someone better than anything else. It’s laughs and tears and hugs. It’s silence in the room, but a silence that comforts you not suffocates you.

Real friends care for you. Especially when you need it most. They know your coffee order. They know what makes you cry. They know what makes you laugh. Real friends would never put you or something you like down, they lift you up. They know which meme to send you to cheer you up. They know when to hold your hand and when to let go. 

Real friends sometimes put you before themselves, because they know you will do the same for them. 

Real friends are love and life.

Just like how Mamma Mia is all about love and life.

Real friends are sisters and mothers and neighbors and people you’ve known since being babies and people you met in the oddest of circumstances. Real friends can be found anywhere, it just matters that they’re found. 

And I am found. 

Even if I had to take the long way round.

Word of the week: together

xoxo 

Spiryt 

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